I have a friend and she ask me where am I in favor. This is the question: "ano mas favor sayo, my commitment pero hindi responsible sayo or wlang commitment pero alam mong mahal ka"
I told her wala. Haha. Parang mali kasi yung tanong?.What kind of responsibilities ba? Is your special someone just doing this reponsibility for love?. This topic is so broad to discuss. I'll just explain the reasons of why people don't want a commitment yet. Pero you should understand na it is part of a relationship, part of loving!.
My friend is in favor on not having a commitment and the important thing for her is knowing that his special someone love's her. However, if there is no commitment, there is no assurance and security. Sino ba naman ang ayaw ng security and assurance sa love diba? pero still it's your choice.
In the first place, we live in a society where all of us have a lot of choices specially when it comes to the matter of choosing a life long partner. We often have true feelings towards our mate but what if he/she does not truly love us? If she/he not commit?.
Is he/she reluctant to commit? - This is the very first question you must consider before trying to do anything or taking your relationship to the next level. You see your mate will be ok to commit at all levels if he/she truly loves you. But if you feel that your mate is having some doubts or is not sure about whether he/she should commit or not then maybe they are not in love with you. Aha! I'm not done yet, below are some of the reasons why your partner can't commit.
Do you and your lover seem to having an overall good relationship, except for the fact that they cannot commit?
Being with a person who avoids commitment is not easy and sometimes can never be changed. There are many people who feel responsible or find ways to blame themselves for their partner not wanting to commit to them. Are you questioning yourself, believing that it is possible that it is something you are doing that is keeping you from getting the commitment you want? It could be, but 9/10 of the times, it is not.
So if it is not you and you and your lover are having a good relationship, then why does he or she not want to fully commit to you? The truth is, there could be a various amount of answers to that question, for it is different for everyone. However, there are common reasons why many people choose not to commit, and that main reason is fear. It could very well be that your partner never really experienced a fully committed relationship, or perhaps they had a particular experience in a past relationship that now has him or her afraid to approach another commitment. There could be deeper reasons, but these are the most common. Another reason many men and women fear commitment is because they are convinced that if they give their lover a full commitment, they will suddenly have their freedom taken away from them, disallowing them to be their true selves or doing the things they like to do and plan to do in the future.
Can you help improve this situation and get your lover to finally commit to you? Yes, there are ways you and your partner can work together in reaching this goal of commitment, but is not something you can achieve all on your own. The best thing you can do if you are involved with someone who cannot commit is to have a talk with him or her about it and ask him or her what exactly is making him or her doubt commitment so much. The next best thing you can do is be patient and give your lover the re-assurance that they are free to be whoever they want to be and that they can continue to do the things they like to do, and continue to plan the plans they have for their personal self. If they still avoid commitment after a while, then perhaps you should go to couple’s counseling, or ask yourself just how long you are willing to wait for you lover to pop the big question of commitment!